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We (I should say my parents: I was busy at college today) got everything out of Shitpartment™ today and now hopefully we'll never have to go back to that hellhole again. i'm kinda bitter but also i feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

they were complaining about how we weren't moving fast enough and how everywhere we left out stuff we couldn't do because it's a "tripping hazard" or some other bullshit and basically they were just really condescending "following protocol," which i get, but you can't expect to move all the stuff we had out in the parking lot back inside in 5 minutes like they wanted us to do. really tho they fucking wanted us OUT, which honestly, it always felt like that since we moved in. they didn't really seem to give a shit about their residents imo. like i get you have a business to run, but the way we were treated really makes it seem like they couldn't give a shit about the people living there. really condescending and mechanical people. some of the employees were at least nice to us. one guy offered to help us until they told him he couldn't because it would be a liability issue, which is understandable. the woman talking to my mom tho, when my mom told her to back off she was like "im just following protocol." ok but you can't honestly expect us to move all that we had there back into the apartment in 5 minutes, then take it back out once the u-haul comes. how the fuuuuuuck do you expect us to move shit that fast, put it back in and then take it back oooout like what the fuck??????

there's some stuff we're gonna have to figure out with storage because we still have too much shit that we probably gotta get rid of. I can only hope that the new apartment isn't as shitty as this one was and that things calm down. idk i really don't want to think of the future right now. too much has just happened in the now, but i'm just writing this as a farewell to that cigarette (also possibly weed?)-scented hell and its robotic management. thank God if i never have to go back! every minute in that apartment, for the past five months, a cramped and chaotic hell. i mean i'm moving into another apartment that's not any bigger and im still with my family and it's only two bedrooms so idk how much the situation will change and in a few weeks i'll probably as frustrated and miserable as i was before the whole eviction process started (especially with my dog's health problems) but for right now i feel like a huge weight has been lifted, and perhaps things will be a little easier than they were when we first moved in to where we were.

i don't want to think about the future at all because too much has happened and it's all just so ridiculous, the shit i have to put up with just going from bad to completely disastrous, but at least we're out of there. it's gonna be weird getting my focus back on college but hey this is the second time in 5 months where i'll have to deal with moving while being in college at the same time, what a fun experience, now with the bonus of recovering from surgery (although i'm doing a lot better today).

should probably focus on the present and not the future, namely schoolwork. no more shitty management, no more cigarette butts and medical weed containers in our back yard dropped by the upstairs neighbors, the parking system at the new place seems less shitty and impractical than the one at the old place. i didn't even notice if there was a cigarette smell or not but our apartments always smelled like cigarettes and other bad smells.
so in the same day, i got the staples taken off my surgical wounds, and we got approved for a new apartment, yaaaaaaayyy

i'm kinda done with getting my hopes too high like the time we moved into the previous apartment and it all went to hell really, i don't know, i've just been trying not to think about anything at all because i've been stressed out these past couple months but really longer than that, probably since we moved there in the first place. i'm honestly glad to be getting out of there. it smelled like smoke all the time and it just seemed a depressing place, so i don't feel too bad about leaving there at least. 

i don't really want to speak too soon about the new place. it looks better but honestly i've just had too much to worry about to even care, like finding a place here at all. i'm lucky enough that my friend and her mom are letting us stay here for the time being. 

there's really a lot i've had on my mind that probably comes with months of stress buildup and almost nonstop chaos from living in that apartment,  finding out your dog has heart murmur among a number of other problems because he's old and you don't know how much longer he's gonna live, eviction, spending spring break getting and recovering from surgery that you had to wait four months to get because that was the only break you had from school between finding out you had gallstones in january, not being able to help parents move furniture out of the apartment because of surgical recovery, having to deal with college at the same time (the second time in 5 months), and having little to no control over the situation.


haha so yeah i don't think this is the end to all of my problems nor do i feel as happy as i did last time. hopefully moving in will be a better experience than november, and hopefully there will be a space available for me to work, or get away from everything, because there wasn't in thaat apartment lol. i don't really feel like being optimistic about it anymore but i think once i start recovering more and more, i'll be able to find a job and start trying to get my life together. maybe i'll start being more optimistic once things "settle down" again. though i'm tired of dealing with what i have for the past 5 months and wish i could transfer already but for right now, i'm just trying to get back from surgery and focus on school. idk there's too much for me to keep track of all at one time 

to end on a more positive note, i at least feel relieved that we found a place and that the worst part of the surgery and recovery is over. i'm getting better, i'm still here, and i'm gonna try to figure things out for myself. i'd go out for a drink to celebrate, but i think with my body being the way that it is, i don't feel much like it and it's probably a bad idea.

 thank you for being there
yo yo yo everybody, i finally got my surgery. it went well. it wasn't fun and for the next few days i get to enjoy having staples in my stomach and A Lotta Pain.

some highlights after waking up from surgery:
-telling the nurse about the time i was nominated for homecoming princess in high school, something i remembered for no reason whatsoever
-mumbling about how the blood pressure cuff was like a shirtless guy in a romance novel trying to grab onto my arm, but it was unpleasant because his arms were snakes
-2 fast 2 furious: the cars go beep beep

most of everything during and after that was just pain and diziness. right now i'm still sore and tired but it's less horrible than it was this morning. thank you to everyone wishing me well, I really appreciate it :heart: i've just been drifting in and out of sleep today
i still don't know where we're gonna live, we're looking for a new place. i don't think we're going back to the apartment. i have surgery on monday. i'm kinda glad we're not going back there to be honest, but not knowing where we're going to live is kinda, y'know, incredibly stressful. aside from that, i'm worried about how much longer i'll be able to keep my dog. so far he's fallen in the pool twice and i don't think he knows how to swim, despite what they say. plus it's cold out, he's got heart murmur...i got a real scare yesterday because he was trembling so much but he's fine. apparently he fell in again last night while i was asleep, hoo boy. he's got a lot of health problems and it probably makes apartment finding a little harder than it already is, but i don't know that i should give him up just yet. i think that's one of the things that hurts most about this situation. 

anyways

the future seems really uncertain right now, but i think somehow things will be ok. maybe later, when i'm not going to feel so good, i'll write about what advice a teacher gave me the other day. it makes me feel a little more sure that there's hope. it's hard because family, but there must be some way out of it!

if anyone has any advice for me, it would be greatly appreciated. thank you.
i don't know where we're gonna go, we might move to a new apartment or something but idk if they allow dogs and my dog is old and has heart murmur, so i'm worried about what might happen to him, i'm spending my spring break getting surgery which 1. prevents me from finding a job while i recover and 2. prevents me from doing probably a lot of things while i recover because i'll be in pain, i have no idea where we're going to live, it's not like i had any personal space or work space where we were living and i kind of hated it there anyway.

so yeah basically right now everything is just bad
We (I should say my parents: I was busy at college today) got everything out of Shitpartment™ today and now hopefully we'll never have to go back to that hellhole again. i'm kinda bitter but also i feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

they were complaining about how we weren't moving fast enough and how everywhere we left out stuff we couldn't do because it's a "tripping hazard" or some other bullshit and basically they were just really condescending "following protocol," which i get, but you can't expect to move all the stuff we had out in the parking lot back inside in 5 minutes like they wanted us to do. really tho they fucking wanted us OUT, which honestly, it always felt like that since we moved in. they didn't really seem to give a shit about their residents imo. like i get you have a business to run, but the way we were treated really makes it seem like they couldn't give a shit about the people living there. really condescending and mechanical people. some of the employees were at least nice to us. one guy offered to help us until they told him he couldn't because it would be a liability issue, which is understandable. the woman talking to my mom tho, when my mom told her to back off she was like "im just following protocol." ok but you can't honestly expect us to move all that we had there back into the apartment in 5 minutes, then take it back out once the u-haul comes. how the fuuuuuuck do you expect us to move shit that fast, put it back in and then take it back oooout like what the fuck??????

there's some stuff we're gonna have to figure out with storage because we still have too much shit that we probably gotta get rid of. I can only hope that the new apartment isn't as shitty as this one was and that things calm down. idk i really don't want to think of the future right now. too much has just happened in the now, but i'm just writing this as a farewell to that cigarette (also possibly weed?)-scented hell and its robotic management. thank God if i never have to go back! every minute in that apartment, for the past five months, a cramped and chaotic hell. i mean i'm moving into another apartment that's not any bigger and im still with my family and it's only two bedrooms so idk how much the situation will change and in a few weeks i'll probably as frustrated and miserable as i was before the whole eviction process started (especially with my dog's health problems) but for right now i feel like a huge weight has been lifted, and perhaps things will be a little easier than they were when we first moved in to where we were.

i don't want to think about the future at all because too much has happened and it's all just so ridiculous, the shit i have to put up with just going from bad to completely disastrous, but at least we're out of there. it's gonna be weird getting my focus back on college but hey this is the second time in 5 months where i'll have to deal with moving while being in college at the same time, what a fun experience, now with the bonus of recovering from surgery (although i'm doing a lot better today).

should probably focus on the present and not the future, namely schoolwork. no more shitty management, no more cigarette butts and medical weed containers in our back yard dropped by the upstairs neighbors, the parking system at the new place seems less shitty and impractical than the one at the old place. i didn't even notice if there was a cigarette smell or not but our apartments always smelled like cigarettes and other bad smells.

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:iconrainbow-nerds:
Rainbow-Nerds Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks for the fave! ^-^
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:iconsaturnsirene:
SaturnSirene Featured By Owner Feb 6, 2014  Student Filmographer
You're welcome! :)
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:iconbluniebieski:
BluNiebieski Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
thankies for watching me! :iconcocoloveplz: yay!
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:iconsaturnsirene:
SaturnSirene Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2013  Student Filmographer
You're welcome! :)
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:iconxdelisabeth69:
XDElisabeth69 Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
Hey!
Thanks so much for the watch!!! :D
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:iconsaturnsirene:
SaturnSirene Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2013  Student Filmographer
You're welcome!
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:icondergogo:
dergogo Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2013
cooles icon OMG. Woah, your art gallery is definitely fantastic! I am a big fan of your artwork. I might share a beautiful song to you in return. [link]
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:iconkianathewarewolf:
KianaTheWarewolf Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Student Filmographer
Thanks for the :+fav: :icontwilightclapplz:
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:iconsaturnsirene:
SaturnSirene Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Student Filmographer
Aw, you know it gurl! :heart:
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